The popular series, “A Dad’s Perspective” is back!
Mommy Masters welcomes Dad, Yale Nogin, who shares his perspective on what he believes to be the best valentine gift a husband can give.
Best Valentine Gift A Husband Can Give
Valentine’s Day is a good reminder of how important romance and intimacy is in our relationships. As people in committed relationships progress together, it is just nature to get into the grooves of our daily roles; mother, father, cook, laundry folder, business person, friend, sibling etc… Valentine’s Day can serve as a spark to reignite intimacy and romance into our lives and see our partners as more than our mommy and daddy roles.
After 15 years of marriage and still loving and even liking each other most of the time and observing other parents who never get to see each other anymore except in their mommy and daddy roles, I believe making the effort to do activities together like dancing is a great way to elevate your relationship which in turn helps to make our parenting experience and all of the other roles we play even more enjoyable.
Men can be doing a better job in general contributing to the cause of keeping romance in our relationships. Men may be more open if they had some tools, because men like tools.
Dance lessons are great tools for fanning the fire of intimacy. Michelle and I have been to many parties lately and it is clear that nothing has changes since high school. From the dance floor you can see all of the ladies sitting, feet tapping, elbows on the table with their chins on their palms watching the couples that are on the dance floor with a longing to be out there with the man they love moving together in a romantic embrace or swirling around to the beat. While the majority of men just sit there and do nothing about it.
What is the problem men? Think dancing is wimpy? Don’t know any moves? Not cool?
Our kids need help with math, we get a tutor, they need help in sports, and we get them a lesson. Why do so many men fight getting a dance lesson? Men may say it is wimpy to dance, however underneath it is probably fear, but really it is simply because of a lack of knowhow which is relatively easy to remedy. After taking some lessons, it is clear that just like anything else it takes a little practice and effort. Men are quick to want our ladies to be sexy and loving and affectionate yet there is plenty of room for us to make some effort and dare I say the first move. This Valentine’s day, men should take the initiative to help our ladies feel sexy by leading them on the dance floor.
It is 2016, time men step up and get out of their comfort zone and get out on the dance floor. When I was a kid my mom would have us dance with her in the kitchen, however I did not have any real structure or know how to lead a partner. Michelle and I tried dancing together although we did not know how to move together and I certainly did not know how to lead, which as a man on the dance floor I am supposed to do.
If a woman wants her man to take a dance lesson and he is not in favor, try explaining that the dance floor maybe one of the last places where a man is a man and a woman is a woman in a classic sense. Where else are you going to find a place where your wife expects and is happy for you to lead? You got it, nowhere else. This could be a powerful motivator!
Ballroom or “social dance” is the total opposite of wimpy. When you learn even a few moves you feel empowered and bold, and it does not matter if you are tall or short, fit or chubby. Learning a few dance moves so you can lead your spouse or significant other on the dance floor is merely a dance lesson away and could bring joy to you and the woman you love today and for years to come.
You can find any number of local dance schools that have “dance parties” most Saturday nights that cost around $15 bucks which includes a lesson.
We see each other in mommy mode, daddy mode, bill paying mode, and dinner/laundry mode, even date night mode i.e. dinner and a movie mode is still different than seeing your partner who is going through your life with you out on that dance floor.
There is something about having a little structure and moving to the beat together and connecting that ignites the fire and makes you see each other as the man and woman who first met instead of the usual mommy and daddy roles we play which can be very powerful as a couple. Dancing is a true home team building activity that takes trust and team work, all of which demonstrate love for each other which I hear is what Valentine’s Day is all about.
Even with a few moves under your belt you can feel like feel like John Travolta and Olivia Newton John.
Invest in dance lessons and you will be investing in adding passion into your date nights and your marriage…
Yale Nogin has been married for 15 years and has 4 children together with his wife Michelle. Yale is the author of “The Hero Dad Infant Manual” audio class for new and expecting fathers and has been teaching his Hero dad class for 12 years in Atlanta. Yale believes that any man, no matter his background can be a Hero Husband and Hero Father with the some Hero tools, a good attitude and some old fashioned effort.